Tethering, grounding and being tied down

I never knew just how important this was to me – or how random a tether could be – until my trusty ‘Rosie’, my laptop, met an early death thanks to a cup of coffee.

I remember some years ago now, when my world began to change, that the feeling I had most of all was the idea that the rug had been ripped out from under me, that I was untethered, and floating through space with no signposts anymore. I lost all that I thought I knew, all I thought I had. My security, safety – my sense of self – was all ripped out from under me without my say-so.

I recovered from that experience and found a way back to myself in the years that followed. In the end of a relationship and uprooting myself interstate, I took little but some clothing and my little Rosie. Over the months that followed, my laptop became my world – it was my link to family, friends and often enough myself. It was my key to the universe, my back-up brain – it was my all. I didn’t consciously think much of it, though. I didn’t really consider just how important it was. Until the very instant it was taken away.

I was right back there again. The rug ripping moment had come back to find me again, and I was floating, untethered. I felt alone in a way I hadn’t since that first time. I felt lost and on pause – nonfunctional to extremes. And finding someone who understood that was harder than I thought it might be.

Once I did, it appeared that perhaps it’s more a matter of people not realising rather than not experiencing. We tether to loved ones, loved objects, familiar places. The feeling of sleeping in our own bed – this is a tethering we don’t consciously realise. To arrive home and find the bed gone – that would leave us without something we subconsciously relied on, untethered. Perhaps not as completely, but the feeling of unease would last until there was a replacement that was suitable, chosen by us, felt ‘right’.

Being untethered is one of the most terrifying experiences of my life.

Advertisements

2 thoughts on “Tethering, grounding and being tied down

  1. Hey There. I found your blog using msn. This
    is an extremely well written article. I’ll make sure to bookmark it and come back to read more of your
    useful info. Thanks for the post. I’ll definitely return.

    Like

Comments Welcome

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s