Sick and tired.

Every piece of emotional/life stress I have is taking itself out on my body right now! My knee is out of whack, my neck is aching, my sinuses are blocked, my eyes are sore, my head is pounding and I need a back massage more than I need food. I’m one giant ball of knots, I want to sleep for 3 weeks, and I’m over it. If I never have to feel anything again it’d be too soon. I’m fed up with my stupid life. I’m fed up with the limitations, I’m fed up of having no control over my life, I’m fed up with having no base for who I am. Im fed up with having no person or place where I can go to make it all ok. Im sick of having to be ‘on’ all the time. I’m sick of feeling like shit and having had all my tools for dealing with being me taken away without replacement. I’m sick of having to prove myself. I’m sick of being misunderstood, I’m sick of every moment being so hard just to exist. I’m sick of not being able to live my life in comfort, security and happiness.

I’m sick of my insides hurting and I’m sick of my outsides hurting.

I’m fucking tired.

I’m tired of having to wake up every day and be me.

/rant, that’ll just be something else to judge me on. I don’t care. If you don’t want to know how I am, please kindly fuck off.

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